#11: Woof! I'm back!

Yes! its me, I'm not in Doggy heaven, I've been poorly. I've lots to tell you, but can't get on the lap top til Mum and Dad's in bed, will write soon. Molly. x

# 10 Hello its me!!

Hello Daddy
Just come back from a lovely walk, and while Mummy is outside shooing away the cats in her own delicate way, I thought I'd get on the lap top and write you, well I'm not on the lap top, I'm under the table with my paws reaching over the top to the keypad. Anyway, sorry it has been a few days since I last wrote to you, but I've had "writers block" thats my excuse and I'm sticking with it!

I made a boo boo this morning, I shared this page on Mum's Face-book by mistake. I know silly billy me, but one of Mums old school chums has mailed her, and she is feeling a little fed up so i thought I'd let the lady read some of my letters to you, I'm told they have a comical quality about them, so I thought I'd share.I do hope they make her laugh, perhaps I should try comedy, a Bafta could be on its way to me you never know!

Well Daddy its been a quiet week, Sue, Gail, Andy, Mo and Leigh all tried to get Mummy to have her party for her birthday last Saturday, but no joy!! she just wasn't going to play, so the punch bowl did'nt come out. instead I had to watch Mummy screaming at the rugby, Wales won, which made her scream louder and then she hit the bottle with a vengance and by 11pm she was dancing like a lunitic to all her Tamla records in the kitchen, on her own! silly cow!! when I could see the lights from the neighbours torches shining into the kitchen and dinning room. I managed to pull the blinds!I can't take much more of this Disco Diva behaviour.
As she had a tipple or two she thought she'd be clever and invite everyone to a party for the Royal Wedding at our house, ha ha,I bet she regrets that now, as she is getting loads of replys, so Daddy if your not home for this Regal event, please could you let me come on-board with you, I could easily portray myself as a sniffer dog, my nose is in good working oder and I can play the part really well, please Daddy, Please!

Mummy's got a suitcase out so it can only mean one of two things, were either going away for a few days or she's being sectioned, the latter would be more prefrible to me, she really does need help, she's talking to herself more and more. Infact today as we went on our walk and she saw alot of flowers being delivered to peoples house, (it must be something to do with the date) she kept saying to herself "I won't be upset if I don't get a bouquet of Roses,I really won't" I DON'T THINK SO DADDY! so whatever this day means, then for your sake I do hope somebody arrives with flowers for her, so she can open the door all shocked and go "For me, really for me" yeah right! I've seen her when she's trying to act all suprised, and believe me Daddy she could give Colin Firth a run for his money.

Ok Daddy, I've found my voice again, so I promise to write to you soon, I do miss you so very much and send lots of love to you. I Miss you

Molly xxxxxxxxxxx


Ps: I'm not one to talk, but do you know on Mummy's facebook status it says that she is in a Relationship with some idiot called Mio Prego!! who the hell is that?
I promise to do some digging and I don't mean the in the garden! will get back to you after my cloak and dagger exsploits.

PPs: Don't worry Daddy if he comes round the house I promise to fart! and blame it on him, or I'll go into a dive and blame my rolling about in agony on him kicking me! and if that doesn't work I'll BITE him !

# 9 Your gone !

Hello Daddy
 I'm sorry I haven't written to you, but I was really upset when you went, I haven't eaten or slept properly since last Friday when you went. I knew your time at home was up, I could see your suitcase at the top of the stairs, and Mummy kept putting things in and then taking them out, her normal routine when it comes to packing. You were also very quiet the last few days and I could sense you were getting stressed with re-turning back to work. Mummy was saying to Michele that its minus 10 deg where you are so I hope your all wrapped up and keeping warm.

Mummy's new coat came yesterday so she looked very smart when she took me for my walk, she's also got new wellies, nice black ones, so she was strutting her stuff when we walked around Plymbridge, she cleans up very well, when she makes the effort!

 I was just hoping that perhaps I would get a new winter coat, one of those fancy ones with tiger print or fur! I did think that with us being a family, when you both bought new coats, you would have bought me one as well! but with me being a bit on the large size after the Christmas feasts nothing is fitting me at the moment, but I will try to lose weight, I did find it funny Daddy when the vet started to tell you off about my weight at our last visit, that you put the blame on Michele and my stay there during your time away in Rome ha ha! another holiday without me. Just thought I'd throw that one in!

Brooke came to stay yesterday and we played ball, and she came for a walk with me and Mummy, she also fed me 3 of her chips, and half of her fish finger, didn't like the peas much, but don't tell Mummy, so much for my diet ha ha! I do love my food

Its Mummy's birthday in a few days, so I am hoping you've thought of something, as I haven't got a clue what to do. Oh god and its Valentines day! so get your skates on Daddy and think of something really nice for her. I know she'll miss you not being around on her special day, but thats ok I will give her lots of love.

Sorry Daddy, I do seem a little boring in this letter,  I just miss you lots and Mummy hasn't got into her stride yet, I'm sure I'll have lots more to tell you in a day or so. Mummy is going to cook "Italian" for the girls on her birthday, so if the punch bowl comes out of the cupboard, and Mummy does her special mixture! there will be loads to tell you the next day, and if I can work her new camera, I'll take some snaps, that should be fun.

Well Daddy I'm going to finish now, as I'm so boring I'm falling asleep myself, so god help you reading this.

I love you lots and miss you more than you will ever know.
  Night Night   xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx




                                                       

# 8 Waiting!

Daddy!!

Your slippers are on the radiator! Mummy has two glasses out on the side!! Hurry Hurry!! I'm waiting by the side door!!

Love you Daddy!!!!! Come on!!!

# 7 I'm at the door !!

Daddy! Daddy!!
I'm at the side door waiting!! come on Daddy nearly home !!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

# 6 Daddy! Where are you?

Hi Daddy
I have been waiting all afternoon by the passage door, everytime I hear a car door slam I'm up! wagging my tail and barking loudly, but you haven't come home, where are you?

I could hear Mummy on the phone to Michele, I heard her say that she had booked you on a flight and was so excited, then she called again to say it was cancelled, then she phoned Michele again to say you had another chance of a different flight home, then! she called again! to say that one had been cancelled just as you got to the departure gate!! Its been like the Telephone exchange here today, Mummy thinks she back working at Orange being on the phone all day. Not a happy home at the moment Daddy, please come home!

Do you remember that funny film "Planes, Trains and Automobile" with John Candy and Steve Martin? well I imagine its like that for you but without the comedy, well I'm telling you Daddy its no fun here either and were not laughing.

You be careful while your in Holland, the last time Mummy was there she ended up in one of those Coffee bars, and she did'nt find her way home either! it might have had something to do with "snow, smoke" or the coffee, but it wasn't the same snow as whats causing your travel problems.
They also leave the lights on in their front room windows and their bedrooms with no curtains up!, Have these Dutch woman got no shame! and they definatley have no TV, they must spend all night standing in their windows, perhaps they are part of their local "Neighbourhood watch" their electric bill must be huge!

You must be panicking about getting home to finish your Christmas shopping, try not to worry there is always the New Year sales, thats if you get home in time for that! One word of advice Daddy, no Clogs, Tulips or Cheese, i don't think that would go down to well.

I hope you manage to sleep well tonight, as you have a long journey home tomorrow, and there is lots of snow and ice on the roads, so please be very careful, and please be ready to play as as soon as you come througth the door, I'm going to jump all over you and lick your face, I know you think thats fun, It will be a race between me and Mummy to see who gets to you first, but I will win! ha ha

Its getting late now and its time for my bed, so I'm going to say goodnight godbless, I miss you very much, and will put my paws together tonight and say my prayers like a good girl, hoping their answered and you come through the front door tomorrow, I'll be waiting!!

I miss you Daddy

      Your little girl Molly Moo  xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

# 5 It's Snowing!!

Hello Daddy
Its snowing!! there's all this white crispy stuff on the ground, its soft and cold and makes a funny noise when you walk on it, yipee what fun!! have got to get Mummy out for a walk in this.
Mummy has just been out in the garden to feed the birds, we don't have any snow shoes so she tied a rope around her waist, attached it to the drain pipe and slide down the garden with food in one hand and poo bags in another, and her phone in her lilac dressing gown pocket in case she fell and needed the emergency services! Funny!, she should have asked me to do it, I'm like Robin Cousins on this stuff!,

 We've got Robins, Starlings, Chaffinches, Goldfinches, Blackbirds the lot! The local cats are going to have a field day if they pop into the garden, but don't worry Mummy is ready with the water pistol and orange scarf, she stuns them with the scarf and then shoots them with the pistol! its hysterical, the cats do find it funny, she really does'nt look the part in her lilac dressing gown and pink rubber shoes, the least she could do is get dressed, imagine my embarrassment if I had to call the emergency services!! not a good look!!

Mummy has worked her Boll!!!s, oops socks off, she's been hoovering, polishing, cleaning windows, the cooker, the fridge, and changed all the bedding, so I know your on your way home!, I'm sure if she had a brush she'd stick that somewhere and multi-task!
Were so excited about you coming home for Christmas and Mummy had some really wonderful news from my Welsh cousin Ryan, so Daddy its going to be a wonderful Christmas and a fantastic New Year hoorah! I'm so excited!! and remember Daddy I have been a really good girl!

Oh!! Daddy she's not happy!!!!!!  Mummy has just found out there are no flights into Gatwick! which means you are not on your way home! This happended to you a few months ago with that bloody Ash cloud from Iceland. God i'm going to have to stay out of her way, under the table me thinks! Apprently this time its to do with this snow stuff!  Oh she's worked so hard and is all ready for you coming home, and we've got a delivery from Tesco's today, Christ! Mummy going to be hitting the Vodka tonight, another reason to hide under the table!

Oh Daddy you must get home, I'm finding it really hard to get on this lap-top without Mummy noticing! She's out the front at the moment with a shovel clearing a path for the Tesco man, if she sees me on this she'll use the shovel on me!! I've got an idea! if you can get across the Channel, I'll send out a loud bark for my Husky friends, one only lives round the corner, we can use our dog leads and pick up a couple of dustbin lids which you can use for snow shoes and we could pull you home! what do you think of that idea? we'll try anything to get you here, just tell us what to do!

OH GOD, Mummy has just run through the front door straight through the side passage and out the back door, waving hysterically her scarf and shovel! CAT'S ha ha, she looks like a raving Banshee! god that was close! their sitting on the fence now, hissing at her! I could go out and growel but I can't be bothered, its to much fun watching Mummy with her lilac dressing gown blowing in the breeze, shovel in hand!

I'll have to go now Daddy, please come home quickly. If your slippers come out of the wardrobe and put on the radiator, and a second glass is brought out of the cuboard then I know your arrival is Immanent! and I'll be by the side door waiting to pounce on you! I always know when your outside the house, I hear the car pull up, and the its door slam, don't ask me how, I'm just a dog, but I do sense when your near. 

Hurry up and come home soon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

# 4 Sad

Hello Daddy,
Its been a long day today, and nothing I do makes Mummy smile, she did'nt sleep well last night and I think she's been crying and she is very very sad. I do remember when I was a little puppy that Mummy and every one was very upset around this time, so I do think I know whats wrong, but its ok I'm looking after her. I keep nudging her with my nose and wagging my tail, I've even gone as far as laying my head on her knee!, she thinks I'm looking for attention but I'm not I'm just trying to show her I care, but I'm not doing very well. I promise to cuddle her tonight when we go to bed, but that does mean I have to sleep on your pillow! Oh lucky me!!!

We went for a long walk this morning, it was cold and crisp, with white ice on the trees and grass but very pretty, it was only me and Mummy in the park, she did bring a bag of stale bread for the birds, I don't think the Council road cleaners were to impressed when she started throwing crumbs everywhere and it was like a scene from that Hitchcock film! they came swooping down from the skies like spitfires! we had to duck!!  I actually expected her to start singing " feed the birds tuppance a bag"! all she needs is a brolly and a straw hat and she's Mary poppins!.

Its Brooke's birthday tomorrow so Mummy has been wrapping her birthday presents, she's my new friend and plays with me when she visits, she is fun and says the most silly things, she's only 4 but she talks like a 40 year old, she loves to shout instructions at me like "sit" and "stay", I just ignore her, ha ha, just my bit of fun.
.
The Christmas lights are on and the house looks very pretty, I think the term is Festive, whatever the word is, it really does look really sparkly and pretty, so remember Daddy to say it looks "festive".
The house is ready the shoppings done, all the presents are wrapped and were ready for Santa, and wether you believe me or not, I have been a very good girl! I did send a letter to Santa asking for one of those pink fur dog coats with a very sparkly collar ( not real diamonds) I would'nt exspect you to stretch to that, and a very big butchers bone, thats all I ask, well actually Daddy I really do think I deserve it, just remember I'm the one stuck with Mummy 24/7 while your away!.

Well Daddy, your home in 4 days, Mummy has gone and got you some drink, I don't know what its called but its a clear liquid and you drink it with coke, you know ! the one that makes you sing and dance in the kitchen!! oh happy days!!.
 I hope your all packed and ready for your journey, make sure your all wrapped up and careful on the roads, the weather reports say that the cold snap is back on its way, so watch the driving.
Its time for me to say night night now, Mummy will be down from her shower, so i must go, will write again in a day or so.

We love you Daddy, and don't worry about us, were ok and I promise to take care of Mummy.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

#3: The Aftermath

Dear Daddy,

It's like Dawn of the Dead here! She shouldn't have used the Cinzano! I managed to break into Uncle Chris and Ryan's bedroom last night! But it was no fun as Mummy was comatosed, sleeping with one leg on the floor and her head on the bedside cabinet. God, I wish I had a camera! So I gave up as she wasn't up to playing the game of chasing me back to my own room, so I just hopped back onto your bed and slept on your pillow.

And she's no better this morning! I've had food in my milk bowl, and milk in my food bowl! Food being the operative word, it was sausage, egg and beans, I think Uncle Chris got my breakfast, but he's still so hungover from last night that he's quite enjoying it! Lynsey's just strolled in. Mummy did offer her something but before she could reel off the breakfast menu, Lynsey had thrown up! Glad it's not on Uncle Chris' plate, because the state he's in, he would have eaten that aswell!

But don't feel sorry for me Daddy, because the way this breakfast is going down I'm looking at a triple portion of sausage, bacon, beans and eggs. And, by the way, Mummy must think I'm stupid, because while they're enjoying their scrambled eggs, they don't realise they're just the ones she dropped on the floor!

I always find it funny Daddy, that when people have a drink they don't have a problem talking, considering alcohol stays in the system for at least eight hours, it's strange that there aren't any stimulating conversations around the breakfast table this morning!

Daddy, do you think Mummy likes guests? The reason I ask is she's actually stripping the beds and hoovering and polishing around them, so does that mean she's a good hostess, or is she just trying to tell them to sod off back to Wales? She's even carried their suitcases to their car! I wish they would take the hint as I'm dying to take Mummy for a walk! I think they'll finally get a move on when I start breaking wind, because this bacon is playing havoc with my digestive system!

And just to end Mummy's day off on the right note, I'm not going to whoopsie in the long grass and bushes, if I can get her to come out, I promise you I shall do in full view of the general public! So, poo bags at the ready! Let's just hope she doesn't topple over, head first, when she bends over to pick it up! I was going to go out into the garden and do one, but I think I'll store it up, bacon rind and egg shells should give her some indication that she's got the breakfast wrong!

At the moment, Daddy, we've got Desert Island Discs on. I'm not sure whether I'd rather be on that island right now, or whether I'd prefer to ship her off! I can understand why you go off to sea now, Daddy! But it's always lovely when you come home! And wait till you see your Christmas presents! I would tell you what you've got, but I'd have to kill you, but on saying that, a good juicy butcher's bone might loosen my tongue!

Mummy's getting all emotional now, because they're leaving, packed up with all their Christmas presents and a hangover, courtesy of Mummy's infamous punch! So, it's back to just us two girls until you get home now, Daddy!

They've gone now, Daddy, they've gone! It's funny because when Mummy was waving at them, she waved with two fingers, rather than her whole hand! And their retort was a one finger gesture, not quite getting that! Lynsey borrowed one of Mummy's old buckets to travel back with, don't get that either?!

Only six days to go now, Daddy! Can't wait for you to get home! xxxxxxxxxxxxx

#2: Dear Daddy, Guess What Happened Today!

Dear Daddy,

Mummy's on the homemade punch again! She's substituted the wine for cinzano added Vodka, cider, plus whatever else she could find in the cabinet! And I'm sitting right in front of her typing, but she's had so much punch, she can't even see me!! Tamla Motown is playing, it's gone 12! And I can hear the neighbours' banging on the wall, but Mummy thinks it's the bass tone of the music!

Actually Daddy, the day started off really well! But please tell me, why Mummy insists on wearing her old coat, bobble hat and stupid tesco wellies, when she takes me out for a walk, when she has a perfectly good barbour coat and walking boots in the wardrobe?! Don't get me wrong Daddy, I'm not ashamed of her, but when I take her for a walk, if I can make sure my backside and paws are clean and presentable, I don't understand why she can't at least make the same effort! I always consider her, for instance today I did a whoopsie in the overgrown grass by the trees (so Mummy didn't have to pick it up, she never gives me enough credit for pooing in the right place!)

When we got back, she hoovered and polished as normal, but did add an extra little vigour to the cleaning as Uncle Chris, Ryan and Lynsey have come down from Cardiff! Camp beds are up, and Uncle Chris is currently occupying one of them (because he's had too much punch aswell!) Ryan's watching a DVD, and Lynsey's hitting Plymouth barbican with the girls! So I'm stuck with Mummy, who at the moment is... Oh, hold on a minute Daddy, Marvin Gaye is on, so I just gotta walk in between her legs and wag my tail because this song really makes her depressed!

Whoops, she nearly slipped then Daddy! No, she's alright, she's leaning up against the sink, she's looking at me as if she slipped from the water from my water bowl, but you and I both know it's all due to the Cinzano in the punch! Daddy, it's a good job you can't hear what the neighbours can hear, cause at the moment she's put all the remaining fruit from the punch in the blender and is trying to extract the last of the juices as the bucket is bone dry! Oh God, she's playing Al Green now!

Mummy's just crawled upstairs to check on Uncle Chris, and found him in the wardrobe, we're not sure if he was trying to take a whizz, or going on a quest to find Narnia, but we've managed to get him back into bed! Dad, you know I always go to bed with my teddy but it's very hard at the moment to carry it my mouth while pressing my body against her knees so they don't buckle!

I'm gonna close now Daddy, because it is way past bedtime, and for selfish reasons if I don't get Mummy up to bed for some sleep, I am not going to get my walk in the morning, and I can promise you if that does happen, I will be doing my whoopsies, on the lawn, at breakfast time, in front of Mummy and guests! Can't wait for you to get home, will write again soon, lots of love, Molly! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

#1: Hello Daddy!

Hello Daddy!!

We can't wait for you to come home, me especially as Mummy is getting a little boring in these cold dark nights.  Pj's, dressing gown and socks are on by 7pm teeth out! so there is no chance of a late night walk, very disappointing.  I realise its cold outside Daddy, but she does have a hat with mittens and scarf to wear!

All the shopping is organised and Father Christmas has been kind enough to parcel all the presents and stack!! them under the stairs, although I can't see any for me, as soon as I sniff around she's on to me! and makes me go on my bed.

 I do love your new pillow its very cosy, Mummy  lets me sleep next to her some nights, but when she goes on one of her kicking fits I get off, she just too dangerous throwing all her pillows around.

Mummy went out in the garden today and put the lawnmower over the solid grass DUH ! I think she was just trying to pick up the bird food, then she got this bloody big orange thing out of the shed, sounds a bit like a hoover, and sucked up all the leaves, she did work very hard oh! and she has tided up all the wood you left on the floor and cleaned your shed! So remember to thank her, or you won't hear the last of it.

 I did manage to get my ball out of my toy box while we were in the garden, bless her Mum really does try to kick the ball, but she is hopeless, I just play along to amuse her. 

Uncle Chris is coming to visit Saturday, just for the night, so I'm determined to tease Mummy and try to get in the spare bedroom during the night or early hours of the morning, ha ha can't wait to see Mummy go! when she thinks I'm going to jump on their bed while their asleep, I do love a good giggle.

Will say goodnight god bless now as Mummy is getting out of the shower and she'll go mad if she finds me on this computer.

We miss you lots Daddy and can't wait for you to come home, we love you lots and lots xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

An Introduction...

Hello, my name is Molly, I'm 5½ year old Golden Labrador, and I live in Devon with my Welsh Mummy and my Irish Daddy. My Daddy's a sailor who spends lots of time at sea, and as much as I love my Mummy's company, I miss my Daddy very much. So, I've decided to write him letters of how me and Mummy are getting on while he's away. So I hope you enjoy having a little insight into my world!