It's like Dawn of the Dead here! She shouldn't have used the Cinzano! I managed to break into Uncle Chris and Ryan's bedroom last night! But it was no fun as Mummy was comatosed, sleeping with one leg on the floor and her head on the bedside cabinet. God, I wish I had a camera! So I gave up as she wasn't up to playing the game of chasing me back to my own room, so I just hopped back onto your bed and slept on your pillow.
And she's no better this morning! I've had food in my milk bowl, and milk in my food bowl! Food being the operative word, it was sausage, egg and beans, I think Uncle Chris got my breakfast, but he's still so hungover from last night that he's quite enjoying it! Lynsey's just strolled in. Mummy did offer her something but before she could reel off the breakfast menu, Lynsey had thrown up! Glad it's not on Uncle Chris' plate, because the state he's in, he would have eaten that aswell!
But don't feel sorry for me Daddy, because the way this breakfast is going down I'm looking at a triple portion of sausage, bacon, beans and eggs. And, by the way, Mummy must think I'm stupid, because while they're enjoying their scrambled eggs, they don't realise they're just the ones she dropped on the floor!
I always find it funny Daddy, that when people have a drink they don't have a problem talking, considering alcohol stays in the system for at least eight hours, it's strange that there aren't any stimulating conversations around the breakfast table this morning!
Daddy, do you think Mummy likes guests? The reason I ask is she's actually stripping the beds and hoovering and polishing around them, so does that mean she's a good hostess, or is she just trying to tell them to sod off back to Wales? She's even carried their suitcases to their car! I wish they would take the hint as I'm dying to take Mummy for a walk! I think they'll finally get a move on when I start breaking wind, because this bacon is playing havoc with my digestive system!
And just to end Mummy's day off on the right note, I'm not going to whoopsie in the long grass and bushes, if I can get her to come out, I promise you I shall do in full view of the general public! So, poo bags at the ready! Let's just hope she doesn't topple over, head first, when she bends over to pick it up! I was going to go out into the garden and do one, but I think I'll store it up, bacon rind and egg shells should give her some indication that she's got the breakfast wrong!
At the moment, Daddy, we've got Desert Island Discs on. I'm not sure whether I'd rather be on that island right now, or whether I'd prefer to ship her off! I can understand why you go off to sea now, Daddy! But it's always lovely when you come home! And wait till you see your Christmas presents! I would tell you what you've got, but I'd have to kill you, but on saying that, a good juicy butcher's bone might loosen my tongue!
Mummy's getting all emotional now, because they're leaving, packed up with all their Christmas presents and a hangover, courtesy of Mummy's infamous punch! So, it's back to just us two girls until you get home now, Daddy!
They've gone now, Daddy, they've gone! It's funny because when Mummy was waving at them, she waved with two fingers, rather than her whole hand! And their retort was a one finger gesture, not quite getting that! Lynsey borrowed one of Mummy's old buckets to travel back with, don't get that either?!
Only six days to go now, Daddy! Can't wait for you to get home! xxxxxxxxxxxxx
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